This is Thirty-Nine!

I’m 39! Oh… and I’m at Niagara Falls…

So we’re at Niagara falls for the weekend, and you know what? If ever I needed a reminder of the magnificence of God, the beauty of this world we get to live in, and how blessed I am to be here, happy, loved and living; this is the perfect place for it.

With every passing of my birthday, I struggle with mixed feelings. I think of my brother, who didn’t get to celebrate this age. I think of my dad, who isn’t here to see his baby of the house embrace this phase of life. But then I also think of where I am, who I am, how far I’ve come and most importantly, why I’m here. I typically end the day happy. I channel the bittersweet feeling to something that looks like determination to make sense of my life; and if that isn’t the push that keeps me going for another 12 months, then what else do I need really?

The last year has been one that fully epitomises my life as I’ve always known it. I’ve never been one to make big long-term plans or obsess over milestones, but this year brought a lot of my vague dreams into existence, with a few unplanned and unforeseen miracles sprinkled here and there. So I’m taking some time out to celebrate my progress, a humble brag you may call it. This is a note of thanks to God. It’s also a nudge to anyone who’s struggling with the 2 things that made my year what it has been - Deciding and Doing!

So….. After, I turned 38,

~ I decided to start a second master’s degree; a one-year full-time degree (yes I was also working full-time). A few hours ago, I completed and submitted my thesis, marking one of the most relevant and in-depth formal learning experiences I’ve had. Oh and with a chartered professional status thrown in, because why not?

~ I decided to put my writing and love for children and cooking to good use. So I wrote and published a book.

~ I decided to dare to vocalise my dream career in a conversation with the Mr, a move that wasn’t particularly necessary (to the untrained eye) considering my career was the best place it had ever been. So when the right one fell in my lap, one where it seemed like the person who designed the job was eavesdropping on our conversation about my career wish-list…. What did I do? Oh yes I made that move and I’m loving it.

~ I decided to move yet again. We’re now living in our 4th continent so far and my quiet concern about the boys’ adaptability has been silenced because they’re thriving and loving it so far.

~ I decided to make the most of all the lockdowns and do all the things I was “too busy” to do otherwise. So I started by turning my previous work commute time to doing things with the family; and the only downside is that these small boys now think they have exclusive rights to our time and attention (“Where are you going? Why are you going without us? When will you be back?”) and you know what? I’m loving it!

~ I decided to expand my creative efforts into new projects for the next 1-3 years. And through that I’ve met some of the most amazing people, blessing my life with every deep conversation, random chat, bout of laughter, meme exchange!

~ I continued to decide to keep on living life to the full, and grabbing every moment. And I’ll keep on making this decision as I go…

~Oh yeah. Also, this blog is ONE YEAR OLD!!!!!!

There’s no race track here. There’s actually no track at all. By some popular metrics, I’d already missed the boat when I turned 30 apparently. Good thing then that I’ve always considered my life a bit of a freestyle organic logic-defying fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants adventure… And what’s most rewarding for me is that somehow, I’ve found structure in the chaos, peace in all the movement and joy in the spaces in-between.

So guess what I’m gonna do as I approach 40? I’ll keep deciding and keep doing. But first, I’ll take a while to breathe in today’s goodness, a break from doing to just being for a while, some boredom to keep my feet grounded, some quiet to focus on the patterns and cadence in the background, and some time to dig deeper into the reasons why - the people with whom I’ve been blessed; those who have made it possible for me to say with this beaming smile and fluttering heart today - This is Thirty-Nine!

So, today, I’ll be donating 39 copies of my book to children’s homes, under-served schools or youth centres. Please send your recommendations to me and i’ll have the copies sent across.

Finally, please…. Celebrate with me…. Have a glass of anything on my behalf today. Maybe even have a slice of your favourite dessert.